Lately it's felt like the world has been conspiring against me. The world does not want me to read You Can Run But You Can't Hide by Duane "Dog" Chapman. Yes, I want to read the Dog's autobiography. I'm not just all about Serious Good Literature. And I'm a fan- what can I say? The flowing blond tresses, the huge biceps, the way he uses his intelligence and skills to make the world a better place... He's Fabio Hawaiian-style, a man who must spend as much time with his bottle of conditioner as he spends with his personal trainer. I've been watching his show on A&E for several months. It's irresistible.
So onto my own search, for his book. I have had it listed on my Bookmooch wishlist for several weeks with no bites. It's not highbrow enough for my usual bookstore haunts. I am unwilling to make a special order for a current hardback that should be no problem to find. The public library near my workplace doesn't have it. Barnes and Noble had it, but I couldn't find it, and I couldn't find a staff member to help me. It was shelved in Sociology/Criminology which doesn't make any sense, because it's an autobiography. But whatever. What do I know, I'm just a librarian. And then I went to Borders last night, which I know has it, and I know where it is- on the first floor, in the Television section. Except there was no one working there! I'm sure there was someone, somewhere but no one I could find, no one near the two large checkout counters. No one wandering the aisles. No one!
So I ordered it from Amazon. And I say to Dog's book: you can run, but you can't hide.